Saturday, January 19, 2008

On top of spaghetti...


Dad came through the surgery. Other than some blood pressure and low oxygen levels, all went well. Because of the b.p., they decided to keep him in the hospital for a few days. His readings were ultra high and a few hours later, really low, so they are keeping a close watch on him.

He is also quite confused; more so than normal. Probably the hardest thing for Mike and I right now is that he thinks mom is still alive. I've been staying with him at the hospital and I don't have the heart to tell him she's gone; I just don't want him to have to go through that again.

He keeps trying to call her but it won't go through. It about broke my heart when he said he'd just have to wait for her to call him. I hope this phase of the disease doesn't last long. Sometimes I think it would be easier on him to be oblivious to the present, like a lot of the people in his nursing home ward are, but of course, that's not my call.

You will notice from the picture, however, that he still has his appetite and that has to be a good thing. The red stuff on his shirt and face is the spaghetti he had for lunch. Some of it even made it to his tummy, I promise.

15 comments:

threecollie said...

Hang in there Laurie...we are thinking of you.

Anonymous said...

From what I've read, you're doing the right thing: don't confront the delusions, roll with them.

I'm thinking good thoughts to send some positive energy your way.

NatureWoman said...

Glad to see your Dad eating so well. Know I'm thinking about you! {{{HUGS}}}

Anvilcloud said...

I'm glad you don't feel it necessary to correct him. It takes some people a long time to learn that. For a while, friends of ours would correct their mother, and it was a new source of grief each time. Of course they stopped after a while.

zoe said...

This must be an extremely difficult time for you but try and stay as strong as you can, even though I can understand this to be a very distressing time.

Your dad looks as if he is doing well - a good appetite is a good thing.

Many hugs,
Zxxx

Ur-spo said...

be mindful of delirium and hospital confusion from multiple medications; it can also cause some amnesia of the whole situation
i too am sending good thoughts you and his way.

Mary said...

Laurie,

He's a trooper. I can't help but feel sad about his confusion. That will pass, I guess.

At least he remembers his wife. My Dad didn't remember my Mom after she left for the hospital and later died. There are a few moments when we think he remembers her, but, for the most part his condition relieves his from heartache. It's a good thing, but very, very sad at the same time.

I wish him a quick recovery. His appetite is good, right? That's great.

Mary

Menchie said...

I'm glad he made it through the surgery and is recovering. :D

Unknown said...

I’m glad to hear that the operation went well—and that the hospital is keeping an eye on the BP and O levels. However, now I want some Italian food and it’s too cold outside to get any.

WithinWithout said...

He couldn't have better, more loving support than you and Mike. Big hearts, big love. Hugs to all.

Gina said...

So glad he is doing well after surgery!

Hugs to you for being such a great daughter!

Unknown said...

No need to do anything but let him be him. You are a special person and your warm energy makes it way to the blog site.

Anonymous said...

Mike said dad was much "perkier" today and that is the most fabulous news we've had in quite awhile. Wolf is coming home to visit this weekend and we should have a fantastic time visiting the kid cousins and gramps and then coming home to Feng Shui the apartment!

I love you all,
Laurie

wd said...

Dear Laurie --

I know from experience that operations can really cause confusion and regression in "older" adults...it's a draining part of the recovery. You are absolutely right - don't confront, just go along. You will learn to say "uh-huh" and "mmmm" a lot!!

Sounds as if you have a wonderful weekend planned!!!!

My thoughts and prayers are absolutely with you at this time!!!

(HUGE bear hug) ....b

LittlePea said...

Glad your dad has his appetite. That's always a good sign. Thinking about you all Laurie :O)