My very wise friend told me to write a list of all of the reasons I could think of to continue down a road I have been following for some time. Then she told me to write a list of reasons NOT to continue down this particular path. I was then to make a comparison of the lists.
She said it would help me make a choice that I have been needing to make for quite some time.
I've made the list, I've checked it twice. I made the decision and now I am having a very hard time sticking to it.
Tell me, how do you make extremely important decisions in your life and how do you keep yourself on track to follow through?
10 comments:
I love the "fork in the road" picture! When I make a big, life changing decision I do like your friend recommended: make a list of pros and cons. Pay particular attention to your reasons on both sides of the list - just because one list is longer than the other doesn't mean anything. I think on it for as long as I can stand it; then I talk to people I trust in my life that I know will give me honest answers. Then I think about it a little more. Then I go with what my gut tells me. The process can take hours, days, or weeks - it just depends on the decision. I made the decision to move to Montana from Oregon in just a few days; I moved away from my entire family, everyone and everything that I knew to go somewhere I had never been and where I knew no one. I kept thinking, "If I don't do this, I will always think for the rest of my life - what if?" That was something I could not ignore and helped me make up my mind. Sorry for the long comment, but you asked a deep question! Best of luck in your decision - those who love you and care about you will support you.
Hi Laurie :) I make most decisions from my gut... from "jai".. the heart.. the sense that controls the other five. Regardless of any socratic method I might try, the gut is the final determinant. If my gut's not okay, all the reason in the world won't make up for it.
~*
It sounds like you're facing a life changing situation. I think writing it all out is a great idea and I wish you all the luck in your choice.
Voltaire once said, "There's a certain inevitable futility in indecision." In other words, if you screw around long enough the decision is made for you.
That's probably not the way to go.
Personally, I've always gone with my heart. It hasn't always worked, but I'd still rather do it that way.
thailandchani already said what I was thinking. You can make those lists, but then see how they make you feel. As thailandchani said, see how your gut feels, it knows.
:-)
Good luck! Hugs!!!
I start with the pro/con thing, then I visualize myself going down each path. If the pro/con list doesn't match up with what I visualize as the best, then I have to revisit the pro/con list. I'm at a major fork right now, and it's driving me crazy, so who am I to talk!!
this one is easy
What does your intuition/gut tell you -BEFORE THE MIND TAKES OVER WITH ALL THE WORRIES?
another way - flip a coin for 'yes or no' - and watch your instant emotional response to the coin's outcome. and reflect on that.
Heck if I know - but if someone tells you how - will you let me know!
xoxoxo
I think writing things down really is a good idea. Even if it's not in a list form. Just writing out how you would feel about each choice can be very insightful. Sometimes you'll find something in there you didn't realize before. Talking is even better- not to someone who gives out advice but just someone who will listen.
Wow, what amazing comments. I just learned so much. Sorry this response is so late.
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